Telling your children about your divorce is likely going to be one of the most difficult conversations you need to have. While some children might take it in stride, others will become understandably upset. As is the case with everything else related to the children, you need to plan for this discussion.
Ideally, you and your ex can work together to make sure the children understand what’s going on. It’s important that you present a united front about the divorce and matters related to the children. Telling all the kids at the same time and with both parents present is likely the best option. This gives you a chance to answer questions and ensure everyone understands the current plan.
Remove the blame
Children will sometimes try to blame themselves for their parents splitting up. You can’t let them do this. You may not want to explain all the details of the divorce, but you should emphasize that this is an adult decision that didn’t have anything to do with the children.
There are a lot of emotions that come with a divorce. The children need to know that they can count on both of their parents for support during this transition. Be sure they understand that they can come to you about their feelings. It may help if you discuss your feelings with them in an age-appropriate manner.
It’s usually best to get the parenting plan established as quickly as possible. This reduces the time of uncertainty for the children and enables everyone to settle into the new way of life as soon as they can. Just be sure that you make decisions based on what’s best for the children as you’re coming up with the terms of the parenting plan.